Non-Monogamy Guides

Flexible Monogamy Definition

Flexible Monogamy Definition

The world of relationships has evolved over the years, and what used to be considered the conventional form of commitment - monogamy - is not the only way couples choose to connect and share their lives today. With the increasing acceptance of non-monogamous relationships, many couples are exploring different relationship styles in search for the perfect fit. One type of relationship that's catching people's attention is flexible monogamy, leaving couples contemplating this form of commitment wondering about its definition, how it works, and whether or not it's a suitable option for their relationship. Keep reading to find out everything you need to know about flexible monogamy and if it would be a good fit for your relationship, and feel free to share your thoughts and experiences with The Monogamy Experiment community.

Flexible Monogamy Definition Table of Contents

Flexible Monogamy Example

Flexible monogamy, also sometimes referred to as "monogamish," is a type of non-monogamous relationship in which the primary couple remains emotionally committed to each other, while also being open to the possibility of experiencing physical intimacy with others outside of the relationship. While this may seem like an unconventional approach to commitment, flexible monogamy aims to find a happy medium between complete monogamy and polyamory by allowing a level of openness within the relationship.

One of the key components to any flexible monogamous relationship is communication. The couple has to continuously engage in open and honest conversations about their feelings, boundaries, and desires, ultimately determining what works best for their unique partnership. The logistics and specifics of flexible monogamy vary based on the individual couple, with some choosing to only experience sexual encounters with others together, while some may allow for solo experiences. Some may decide on specific rules, such as no repeat sexual partners, veto power, or pre-approved partners only.

Flexible Monogamy Example

Let's take a look at a hypothetical couple, Alex and Sam, who have decided to explore flexible monogamy. They have been in a monogamous relationship for five years and find that they still love and are committed to each other, but they both desire some level of sexual freedom outside of their relationship. After having several honest conversations, they decide on some ground rules for their flexible monogamous relationship:

  • No emotional involvement with outside partners
  • Any sexual activities with other people must be pre-approved by both of them
  • No sexual encounters can occur in their shared home
  • Regular check-ins and conversations to address any feelings or changes in their comfort levels

By agreeing on these rules, Alex and Sam can now navigate their flexible monogamous journey with transparency, consent, and trust. This arrangement can potentially enhance their relationship by eliminating the notion of "cheating," allowing them to explore their sexual desires without guilt, and reinforcing their emotional connection to one another.

Throughout history, societal norms have dictated the "proper" way to conduct relationships, with monogamy long reigning as the ultimate form of commitment. However, as society continues to evolve, so do relationships, and no longer does one size fit all when it comes to matters of the heart. Flexible monogamy may provide the perfect balance for those seeking a relationship that is emotionally secure yet sexually diverse, a significant step toward a fulfilling, honest, and communicative partnership.

If you're interested in learning more about flexible monogamy or exploring other relationship styles, be sure to check out the other guides at The Monogamy Experiment. Don't forget to share this post and encourage others to join the conversation on this thought-provoking relationship trend that's reshaping how we view monogamy and commitment.

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About Caitlin Schmidt

Caitlin Schmidt, Ph.D., is a revered figure in relationship psychology and a celebrated sex therapist with over 15 years of deep-rooted experience. Renowned for her compassionate approach and penetrating insights, Caitlin has dedicated her career to enriching people's understanding of love, intimacy, and the myriad relationship forms that exist in our complex world. Having worked with diverse individuals and couples across the spectrum of monogamy, non-monogamy, and polyamory, she brings a wealth of real-life wisdom and academic knowledge to her writing. Her compelling blend of empathy, sharp intellect, and unwavering professionalism sets her apart in the field. Caitlin's mission, both as a practitioner and as a contributor to The Monogamy Experiment, is to educate, inspire, and provoke thoughtful discussion. She believes in fostering a safe, judgment-free space for people to explore their relationship dynamics, ensuring her readers feel seen, heard, and understood. With every article, Caitlin continues her commitment to shine a light on the realities, challenges, and beauty of human connection. Her expertise makes her an indispensable guide as you navigate your journey through the landscape of love and relationships.

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